You try and you try....

But sometimes, you can't cheer up.


Sometimes, it's just rough. And you wish and wish you lived near an old close friend, or a sister, so you could share a pizza, or watch a movie, and feel comforted. Just by the presence of the other person.


It's been a hard week. A good friend is very very sick, had a stroke, and I don't know how to help. My grandmother went in for surgery on Monday, but she is too far away to visit. So I get "reports". My husband also had surgery (last week) and he's fine, but has been recording all of this week, until 2 am every morning.


And yesterday the doctor tells me I've lost five pounds. This is not good in the last weeks of pregnancy.


"There's no need to be alarmed" she says, after checking my weight three times, looking alarmed.


"Try not to worry," she says. "If there is damage, it's already done."


"There's nothing you can do," she says. "Just go eat some cheese."


But I'm lonely, and tired of these blue feelings. And there's nobody, nobody, to eat cheese with.