Friendster inspired...
So... a random stranger wrote to me through Friendster, and asked me (since we have all sorts of random common interests like Lucinda Williams and Tefillin) what my favorite thing about Yom Kippur happens to be...
Truth be told, I don't know much about the holiday, except that my dad embarasses me by wearing plastic flip-flops over his socks on Yom Kippur. And that my teeth feel fuzzy all day.
But I've always liked that part of the service where we pound our chests... so I scrambled in to Jerry's office to ask him about the chest-pounding. I said, "Jerry... What's that thing where we pound our chests?"
He looked confused, but after a minute he looked un-confused, and he explained...
Turns out... that's the Vidui!
Vidui?
During the Vidui, we are asking forgiveness for a litany of things... all kinds of things most of us have never done (maybe covetous-things, or sins to do with livestock. I dunno...)...
But we say them because we are asking forgiveness as a community, so we ALL ask them ALL, in the first person plural... and we pound away as we ask.
Which is interesting, especially for those of us who are critical of our COMMUNITY and the things it chooses to do, of its evil intentions, and evil lack of intentions...
So I'm glad to say the VIDUI, and even to strap myself to all those chest-pounding sins, or to strap those sins to me...
BUT even cooler... the Vidui is alphabetical, because we sin through the alphabet!
We sin through the alphabet...
And of course, the best part of all of this... is that you only get forgiveness for the sins against G-d, because in Judaism, you have to ask the people you've harmed for forgiveness.
So that asking G-d for forgiveness after you've smashed your sister's head with a frying pan won't work. G-d says it's up to your sister to forgive you for that...
BUT EVEN COOLER than the other cooler things... is that your sister HAS to forgive you at Yom Kippur! She has to!
Even if she got 27 stitches after you whacked her with the frying pan.
Even if it still hurts!
And if you ask her for forgiveness 3 times, and she decides to be a stubborn bitch...
Then you get the "forgiveness" credit anyway. Yep!
You HAVE to ask... and they HAVE to forgive.
Or vice versa... how nice is that?
Truth be told, I don't know much about the holiday, except that my dad embarasses me by wearing plastic flip-flops over his socks on Yom Kippur. And that my teeth feel fuzzy all day.
But I've always liked that part of the service where we pound our chests... so I scrambled in to Jerry's office to ask him about the chest-pounding. I said, "Jerry... What's that thing where we pound our chests?"
He looked confused, but after a minute he looked un-confused, and he explained...
Turns out... that's the Vidui!
Vidui?
During the Vidui, we are asking forgiveness for a litany of things... all kinds of things most of us have never done (maybe covetous-things, or sins to do with livestock. I dunno...)...
But we say them because we are asking forgiveness as a community, so we ALL ask them ALL, in the first person plural... and we pound away as we ask.
Which is interesting, especially for those of us who are critical of our COMMUNITY and the things it chooses to do, of its evil intentions, and evil lack of intentions...
So I'm glad to say the VIDUI, and even to strap myself to all those chest-pounding sins, or to strap those sins to me...
BUT even cooler... the Vidui is alphabetical, because we sin through the alphabet!
We sin through the alphabet...
And of course, the best part of all of this... is that you only get forgiveness for the sins against G-d, because in Judaism, you have to ask the people you've harmed for forgiveness.
So that asking G-d for forgiveness after you've smashed your sister's head with a frying pan won't work. G-d says it's up to your sister to forgive you for that...
BUT EVEN COOLER than the other cooler things... is that your sister HAS to forgive you at Yom Kippur! She has to!
Even if she got 27 stitches after you whacked her with the frying pan.
Even if it still hurts!
And if you ask her for forgiveness 3 times, and she decides to be a stubborn bitch...
Then you get the "forgiveness" credit anyway. Yep!
You HAVE to ask... and they HAVE to forgive.
Or vice versa... how nice is that?
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